Some notes from facebook

Hey teman - teman, kali ini saya akan mengcopy semua yang pernah saya tulis di notes facebook saya. facebook saya akhirnya di hack juga :'( untuk yang kedua kalinya. I'm kinda stressed out !! tapi nampaknya saya nggak bisa berbuat apa - apa selain mengamankan semua yang pernah saya shared disitu sebelum nantinya bermasalah.
Disini saya akan menulis kembali catatan - catatan kecil saya di facebook tersebut, terimakasih buat yang memberikan atensi :)

Ini notes saya yang terakhir sebelum akhirnya lima menit kemudian saya tidak bisa log in kembali

Seriously, I have no idea :)

Yes, I have no idea to titled this notes.
I don't know why today there's so many things happened to me.
Laugh, Cry, and finally Smile :)
I'm so humanise, sometimes I hide all those pathetic things in me. I think there's no one need to know about it.
But I'm glad when they told me that my eyes won't lie, it showes the real I am.

And today, all those phase distortion was on me.
Sometimes, I don't know what I really want and I'm so tired of the drama.. pretending everyday.
I just want to bea normal. I want all those dreams.. my dreams seems like a castle in the sky.
I say I'm not breaking as my spell everytime I started to fall.
but, it's never enough to make me stronger.
I may looked so toughful and so calm facing all those crazy things in this life.

Hey... I'm not a sailormoon neither or xena the warrior princess.
I'm so ordinary, bit of a bored, and yeah I may not be brave.
But, I believe in a thing called Faith.
I trust the power of me is my Faith.


This notes I dedicate to all my besties in the world :

My mom, My dad, and My bro who have no facebook account ( I can't tag but I hope you know that I really love my family ). My bestfriends, best buddys, best partner Jagonk they are Nenden, Dian, Widy, Miemy, Ricky, Irwin, Haris, Dimas, Ciman, Abet.. you know I never learned to smile without you all. My dear brother, bestfriend, best man who always listen all bored stories in me Unix rahmasaputra.. well I don't know how to tell you, you always makes me feel better :). My besties Ndud, Acid, Deis, Pipit, and all of my firend on college who always smile for me.. thanks for every moments that you ever spend with me, that's so unforgotable :). For all of my sistas and bff on this facebook Arrantxa, Lily, Sara, Ivana,Nur, Angelina.. thanks a lot to throw away my emptiness when I'm alone, you guys the sweetest things that I ever found :). For my special girl who always makes me smile and happy.. she's my BSF Tamey Cansin, you're my sista forever thanks for the joy you bring to me :). For the girl next my door haha ayu, thanks to accompany me everyday :).

THANKS.. THANKS.. THANKS.. THANKS..
thanks to energized me, I'm so happy to have you arround. I'm so sorry if I have made any mistakes to you all..

special to my jagonk, as ricky always said : you're never walk alone :) :)

I LOVE YOU MORE THAN I CAN SAY :)
BIG THANKS TO YOU ALL :)
<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

ini notes yang sebelumnya, pada saat saya menulis ini saya dalam keadaan yang emosional nampaknya :)

I don't believe in a words " Forever " and " always " (you may say it's my monologue)

I remember when we started on wednesday, you texted me and told me that you needed help.
and I helped you sincerely so I texted you back.
we're friends and I don't even know anything about you. we know each other but not really.
till that day when I was alone and waited for my friends in the morning, you say hello.
and then we talked about something, we've been connected since that day.
I'm so happy when I talked to you, you was there wherever I am.
and I loved to call you my bestfriend.
we're together. me, you, and another my bestfriends.
we spend our last moment before we're graduate together, breaking my rules cause I was in home late at night. but, yeah that's so fun and unforgotable.
we're closer more than just a friend. I told you everything, you told me everything.
and untill that words came from you :
" I will always by your side whenever you fall down and we're never apart, cause we're inseparable and you're irreplacable forever "

and now I just can sing :

"cause it's seems to me this things are breaking down.
we almost never speak I dont feel welcome anymore.
baby what happened please tell me
cause one second it was perfect, now you're half away out door

was I out of line? did I say something to honest?
made you run and hide like a scared little boy
I looked into your eyes, thought I knew you for a minute
now I'm not so sure

and I stare, at the phone
you still hasn't called
and then you feel so low you can't feel, nothing at all
and I started flashback to when you said forever and always

and it's rains in your bedroom, everything is wrong
it rains when you here and it rains when your gone
cause I was there when you said forever and always"

I dont really believe if there's a thing would be everlasting.
not " forever and always " but " always nothing last forever "

He's never really gone actually :)

LOVE

Love is real, real is love,
Love is feeling, feeling love,
Love is wanting to be loved.

Love is touch, touch is love,
Love is reaching, reaching love,
Love is asking to be loved.
Love is you,
You and me,
Love is knowing,
We can be.
Love is free, free is love,
Love is living, living love,
Love is needing to be loved.

Have you guys ever heard that song ? it's the one of old song by John Winston Lennon, I think you know who he is and you know the story about him, eventhough only a little part story but I'm sure you know about him and his amazing band The beatles. It was 29 years ago today that he was shot dead in his new york apartment. But, yes the memory will last forever, there's so many people sing his song nowadays including me tonight. I was born on 1990 and he was gone on 1980. but my dad always sing it to me since I was kid, he told me the story and showed me the picture of him. and The beatles become a part of my life.

My dad sing hey jude to me with a guitar, he loves beatles so much. and I love their songs eventhough that's too old to me :).

John Lennon gained worldwide fame as one of the founding members of the beatles. He's the one of music legend and also peace activist. Well, I'm not really know about the story of John Lennon. sometime the story could be forgotten in times, but John Lennon will be last forever. I was watched chapter 27 a month ago, and I know the tragedy from that movie. because my dad never told me the detail was, maybe he was told me but I'm not really paid an attention at that time. That's tragic and unbelievable, if you ever saw that movie maybe you will understand what I mean. And I was wondering about the book, The catcher in a rye. yeah, it was influenced Mark David Chapmann who shoted John Lennon at that tragic night.

Okay, back to the point. it's inspiring John Lennon.

I was ever read in some artices that Mr. Lennon has a rebelion side, he also ever showed his cynical humour taste at his films like A Hard Day's night (1964) and his book In His Own Write. He used his popularity to supported his activity in a mission of peace. The saddest tragedy in his life is when his mother was hit by a car  and it happened in front of his eyes when he was 17. and it might be a caused why he have a negative thought to a men in power. His mother dead because of the police in the drunkennes, but the police was beaten the rap. John Lennon was reputed as a clown of his class when he was school, yeah he was only make a joke during the class. Maybe it's ridiculous, yeah the legend of music in the world was looked silly in his past time. But, that's not a big deal. we can't compare those little things with his contribute to the world. He's so inspiring and unforgetable.

For me he's the one of reason why I really love my life, I wish to be inspired like him :)

and the beatles's songs always brighten up my life, cheer me up, makes me always wanna sing.

I swear, I really want to mention his achievements here. But, it's gonna be too long. yeah he was always do his best in every performance. Well I wish someday I could meet another John Lennon in this world, who can brighten up the world with his/her work. who can inspired everybody so we can share the peace and cherish the love to each other :)

I love you John Lennon, I love you the beatles.

Rest In peace John Lennon, you might be gone but the memories of you will last forever :)

 

 

PS : FOR ME, YOU'RE NEVER REALLY GONE. YOU'RE STAY IN MY EVERYTHING :)

a joke , a joke , a joke , it's just like a joke.

Look at this picture below ! it's miley and liam on the last song movie ( the one of movie that I waited to watch on 2010 )

Well, it's not about miley and liam neither their newest movie. But, hey look at that picture, they did some conversation there. I don't even know what they talked about exactly, but I just can see the sweet thing happen to them.

Okay, I will keep my promise to you guys. Now, I'm gonna use Indonesian language in my every notes. eventhough I will still put some english on it and I hope you don't mind :) .
Worldie, jujur kali ini saya sedang merasa nyaman dengan apa yang telah saya miliki saat ini ( saya telah menulis tentang ini pada tulisan saya sebelumnya ), banyak teman, punya kesibukan dan waktu luang yang cukup, kuliah saya teratur, dan ya saya sangat senang dengan kehidupan yang normal ini. Meskipun sebenarnya banyak yang bertanya : " kenapa sih lo nggak mau pacaran ? " atau
" lo kenapa tu cari pacar banyak milihnya ? " . Bukan apa - apa, saya sama sekali tidak bermaksud untuk mengkotak - kotakan orang buat jadi pacar saya, that's so unfair karena pada dasarnya semua manusia itu sama. Yang membedakan cuma cara pandang dan kemauan, lagipula kita semua ciptaan tuhan and yes we are different in a good way.
So, what happen to me? saya sama seperti remaja perempuan seusia saya. saya suka jalan - jalan, nonton film, makan es krim, tertarik sama dunia fashion, it's just normal I think. Saya memang agak introvert dan protektif terhadap diri sendiri, ini bukan karena saya terlalu mencintai diri saya sendiri tetapi ini merupakan tanggung jawab saya karena saya tinggal berjauhan dengan orang tua. We need to protect our selves from the negative thing. Dan saya juga suka bergaul, have fun bersama sahabat - sahabat saya di sela jadwal kuliah sangat menyenangkan :) .

Let's stop to talk about my self, that's not really interesting it's kinda bored actually.

Miley and liam looked so in love each other, and I think I just feel the same way right now. it's sounds crazy funny to me, I was never feel this way since two years ago, and hey why I feel it now ? that's so terrible to me. Saya menahan tawa ketika saya menyadari hal ini, dan saya yakin pasti teman - teman saya yang membaca posting tulisan saya ini akan bertanya :
" jatuh cinta sama siapa lo cil ? " .
Awalnya saya tidak ingin mengakuinya, I was pretending day by day about this. but, I can't fool my heart anymore, that's too pathetic. saya sadar bahwa perasaan jarang berbohong, saya tidak bisa berbohong pada diri sendiri. saya tahu bahwa saya selalu mencek facebook nya setiap hari dan berkali - kali, hanya untuk mengetahui bagaimana keadaanya. norak ya ? tetapi, saya benar - benar tidak bisa mengotrolnya.

I feel that butterfly in my stomach, like everybody always says it really happen when you're in love.
But, I'm too ashame to admit it. ketika saya bertemu dia saya hanya ingin menjauh darinya dan melihatnya dari kejauhan, meskipun terkadang hanya punggungnya yang dapat saya lihat. it's like a big joke, ngapain punggung orang diliatin ! but it's happen to me, that joke happen to me.
Dia bukan orang yang luar biasa, jujur dia orang yang sangat biasa. Jauh dari kriteria pacar impian saya. but, it comes too natural, dia sering membuat saya tertawa belakangan ini. Dan kali ini, saya tidak bisa memprotect diri saya seperti biasanya. and yeah maybe I'm in love poison now.

Enough.
that's all my monologue.
Thankyou for reading :)

Is not a big deal, isn't it?

Hey worldie how are you guys? I wish all of you are ok.
Lately, my friend told me that why I'm always use english when I write a blog to publish ? he was guess that I'm not proud of my country language Indonesia. Honestly, is not on the purpose. Just because I use english as a notes on my blog it's doesn't mean I'm not proud for being Indonesian youth and I really proud with a kind of Indonesian language. The fact is I feel so free with using english on my every articles. But it's doesn't matter for the next article I will use Indonesian language, but I still put english on it.
Talking about all of the Questions from anybody to me, they asked me anything and sometimes I was feel so confused and weird with all those questions. Because, the questions was makes me feel bored and you know what, they asking me the same questions for many times. I will not to be rude, but yeah I just got bored and tired of it. they asked me : " restu, why you don't have boyfriend ? " and I answered : " haha, that's not a big deal " but, they wants get the explanation from me, they wants a reason why. and I really dont want to talk about that please.
why ? Because I love my life now. eventhough some people said that I'm too hypocrite, because without boyfriend I will feeling so lonely, and minus. Maybe, those statement is true if I believe that's true. but, hey I don't think so. I have so many friends who care for me, I have anybody to share anything, and yes I really love them so much. I'm not pretending, honestly I feeling so  lonely sometimes. it's so normal right? and it wont stay too long in me. because I'm always have a lot of things to do and when I have some free time I will spend it with some fun activity like facebooking, blogging, or having fun with all my best friends here ( we can go anywhere ), or maybe I can get some sleep and having my nap.
Worldie, we can joy our time eventhough there's no boyfriend or girlfriend in our lives. trust me is not a big deal, but it doesn't mean I wont have boyfriend ( haha lol :p ), maybe later. I just try to find out that Mr. Right man.
So, don't worry be happy :)
you have to joy your life worldie .

Everlasting Memories

It so reminding and feels like has been recorded obviously all the memories that will never been erased and I will never to get over it from the story book of my life. eventhough that's the saddest tales of mine. and that's why you will always be exist there, forever.

I still remember what song's that you ever sang at that moment, a moment when you lean on my shoulder and you sang it out loud. everything seems like recorded on a compact - disc and I can press play anytime when I want to see it.

You are more than just a thing, although you will never be more than a thing that could defeat my power now. but, you're the one who create that something called power in me, you makes me looked stronger than before already. you also taught me how to leave something that unimportant to be maintained. you make me stronger, make me more understand, more to be realistic, and more to appreciated what I get and what I have.

You're not a hero. you're just a boy with a simple things and so easy to be guessed. but, you're like a sunlight who always warm me up after the rain fall made me feel so cold when I waited for the rainbow. eventhough I dont even  know when will the rainbow gonna be sees. and you noticed me that sunlight will always shine on everyday, although it could be fogbound sometime. that's you, you're the sunlight who always makes me believe without a point of a reasons.

I will never be too much when I tell something about you, I will never do that. it doesn't mean that you not to be deserve that, but I'm always wants you to stay in your characther. honestly, I'm always learned something from your humanise characthers.and guess what, I was realizing about something when you cry in front of me. that I was admit my weakness. it caused I cry too, same as you. you looked so brave just like superman when you stand beside me, but you also looked tearful when you cry just like a baby. and I feel the same way. I'm not strong as I guess before ( something that I will never want to admit ).

People are people, they can changing when they think need something to be changed. but, I'm ever ask God, I asked  " please, keep him safe on his self so he wont be changed ". but, I know now it's impossible. people always changing because it's a human nature. and it's happened to you, now you looks so joyable with your slow changed.

I will make a confessions :

I really missing you so much.

I think I'm normal, it's just very normal when I miss your laugh in front of me, I miss you share anything with me. because, I feel so different now. you're walk through so far with the wind arround you, with your changed.

maybe I looked so sad, but I believe you will always shine on.

you're mean a lot for me, eventhough I can't says that you're my everything. because you will never got my whole heart. and I will never stay in your heart forever, although I can still remember when you say that I'm irreplaceable. we're just ordinary people, we will be changed everytime without any awarness.

But, I will always remember you.

I will save you in my story book, in my memory that I will never erase.

I will remember you with all the revolution of your self changed.

and wait for you to sing a song and lean on my shoulder anymore.

I love you my best friend.

I love you my sunlight.

Oh I really proud of this one girl very much

Good evening worldie :)
Worldie, today I'm happy because I was change my blog's look, and you can see now my blog page is more fascinating to look than before. yaay :D
Btw, today I was chatted with my friend tarra and she's my friend on facebook. she's talented on writing and I hope we could go on chat anymore someday.
Well, worldie I have told you before about my dream and how am I interest with writing. Yes I wish with writing I can do something worth and could be a part of the greatest thing in the world.
Okay worldie, do you know who is alanda kariza ? if you're the reader of gogirl magazine or cosmogirl magazine you must be know who she is. Yes, she's a young girl, an amazing young girl actually.
Alanda kariza was started her goals with writing articles in some magazines and websites, and then I read her blog and guess what I really love to read what she wrote.
Simple but so interesting, as a young girl she's really really awesome. now she's 18 years old, younger than me. But, she has so many cool experience and you know guys I'm always envy her ( in positive ).
Now I'm 19 and I still doing nothing here, I dont want to be too ordinary. I'm always eager to be special, do the special things exactly. I really wanna hear my mom said " I'm proud of you ".
and alanda's mom must be so lucky and proud of their pretty girl.
Yesterday, I was posted a comment on Indonesian youth conference page. and the page was told us that alanda kariza will flight to london tomorrow and that means tonight, she will attend GYS 2009 overthere. and I say : " omg I really want it "
alanda is always making me amazed her and I was agape when I saw everything that relate to her. and I wanna be like her, wanna be like her.

This is alanda when she was attending Guildford forum Global Change makers as representative of Indonesia

Alanda was attended global change makers and also British council, and I was read on her blog that both of the programme was helping her to get connected with a wide of the world. she was attended the programme which attended by youth of nation arround the world. she wrote on her blog that we can do the same thing with attending global change maker as her, I wanna attending but still confuse how to apply.
and I will do more actions by following the community like that, who knows I'm the next alanda. eventhough I'm older than her. So, I will apply for British Council firstly and then I will apply for Global change makers.

Maybe you may think that I'm not creative and just plagiary of alanda. But, I dont really care, to be more creative I have inspiration and she's alanda kariza. I wish she could read what I write about her and in one day I hope I can meet her.
Worldie, I suggest you to read alanda's blog, you can find her on www.alandakariza.com and trust me she's so adorable :)

me and tamey <3

Hey worldie good day :)
well, yesterday I didn't write because I have to went out so I can't write.
But today I'm back to write again :)
Worldie, last night I was talk to my friend, actually my best friend she's tamey. Tamey is the one of my friend from turkey and guess what, we have never meet in a real world before, I just know her over facebook, she's so kind and helpful. so, we're being friend. even best friend and now I called her sissy (means sister).
I was tell her my little secret last night and talk with her is always so fun and makes me feel better. okay worldie, I just want to tell you that's tamey are so amazing, she's a good friend for me. so, now I will tell you what was me and tamey always talk about.
it's DREAM.
both of us has one dream, a big dream.
I wanna be an author and tamey wanna be a popular singer, and I know that's so ridiculous for some people. because, it was a dream of little child on five year, haha :P sometimes I think so.
But you know what, me and tamey really want it all, we think our dream is important thing and we should fight to achieve.
 Dream for us are weapon to fight all of crazy thing in this world, we wont judge our selves that we can't do something. we will pushes our selves that we can do everything. and we know we can do it.

Lazy morning :)

hey world good morning :)

it's not really in the morning actually, it's 10:06 here, and I just woke up from my bed and still need some sleep maybe lol :D. but the sunshine outside the window was not permit me to do that :(

I think this day could be my lazy day, it's lazy morning. I have no schedule today.

it's gonna be fun all day long I wish.

But, I still miss my family so much, I really wanna come home and joy my lazy time there.

that's so pathetic :(

can't wait for next month and I will come home.

Okay let's back to the first point.

it's lazy morning.

what you gonna do if you have free time like this?

FRIENDSHIP

Persahabatan.
Seperti tak dapat dijelaskan.
Persahabatan itu adalah kebebasan, tak butuh simpul tali untuk mengikatnya, karena jika ia memang abadi ia takkan pernah pergi.
Sahabat, a friend indeed = a friend in need.
Bukan berarti sahabat mengerti semua tentang sahabatnya, tapi sahabat selalu mengisi segala yang tak dapat dimengerti.




in this pict : niiandud, restu, citra